My sacrifice.

Happy Holiday everyone! :)

Finally caught THOR but I actually didn't enjoy it as much as I expected. Spent quality times with my cousins again, and I was reminded of how worthy it is to spend time with people who matters. I can't actually recall how long we have been separated, and how distraught I was. Has it been a month already?

Sometimes, we lead our life knowing well enough that everything is over. We try to move on, open our heart, accept someone new. But then again, the wound is still fresh. "Fall in love when you're ready, not when you're bored/lonely." I know for sure, that at this point in my life, I'm enjoying my single hood and is not ready for anyone else. It was the lousiest choice to move in and out of my past relationship within weeks. That must have explained the state I have landed myself in.

S said that I'm a strong woman, and that I'm the greatest girl he has ever met. I guess it has been long since someone complimented me so genuinely <3 I'm thankful for such sweet gesture and was reassured of the decision I have made.

Of course, this healing process is tough. There were still nights that I missed him so dearly I hugged my snowman and cried hard. There were also times that I drove on the highway, and a certain song reminded me of our beautiful memories, that silent tears dropped. I remembered how he would stop those tears, because they were once painful for him to see them. I couldn't forget how hard he fought for me to accept his love, and to move on from my previous relationship. He promised that he would bring me happiness. I was overjoyed. It was all a LIE.

Our relationship has come to an end. I hate the fact that I'm still clinging on to the broken pieces left hanging around. Why did he leave me behind? Why didn't he see my sacrifice for this love?

Tonight, I vow never to cry over us again. Cause PJJ, I hate you and I never wish to see you ever in my life again. I want to move on and find someone ten thousand times better than you.

From now on, you should mean nothing to me anymore. It's time I stop blogging about us. It's time I grab a life without you in my head. It's time I face the reality that everything is over. We're completely over. It has always been so clear, but I never got it. No words of apology, no guilt, no shame. This has been the man I've loved for 4 years.

I was blind but not anymore. I've woken up! Leave me to cry for the very last night... ...